It’s 5:30 am….I’ve been awake since about 2 am!!! I could not sleep – this frustrates me because I simply cannot function very well without at least 6-8 hours of sleep! I finally just got up at 3 and so for the last two hours I have been reflecting and meditating on my study material for Proverbs 31:18-24. Hmmmm…I’m reminded of verse 15 “She rises also while it is still night and gives food to her household and portions to her maidens”. Well, I’ve got the “rises also while it is still night” part but I think I am falling a little short on the food part!
Falling short! Sometimes I feel lately that I am falling short in so many areas. This is such a different season for me than what I am used to. I find myself so often looking back to how I used to be. Times when I had 2 small girls of my own, working full time, then leaving my job to be a stay at home mom. During both seasons I was in God’s Word – living out Proverbs 31, serving God, serving my family, rising above impossible circumstances. It seemed like I could do it all! But now, in this season for some reason I seem to just be “hindered”. I cannot get past stumps in my path. As a result, I find myself feeling weak, without strength to press on, feeling like such a failure, all the negative feelings that in my head and heart I know are not true but in my actions just immobilize me.
I have just came from a season of such busyness in my ministry and job that I have developed a lot of “clutter”. My house is one big chaotic cluttered mess and it follows me to my office, my car, my garage, my heart. Oops! Did I just confess that? Yes, I did and I believe that this is the first step in pressing on to living a true life that is unhindered!
How do I plan to do this? At the first of the year I started choosing life verses along with the Siesta’s with Beth Moore committing to memorize 24 verses from God’s Word in 2011. I’ve done good at choosing my verses – not so good in the memorizing but as I was just looking over them and practicing the first 13 in my card file I am reminded of the power of God’s Word and hiding it in my heart. I want to share these verses with you:
Jan 1 – Hebrews 12:1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.
Jan 15 – Hebrews 12:2 Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scourning it’s shame and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
Feb 01 – Ps 16:11 You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; in Your right hand there are pleasures forever.
Feb 15 – 1 Peter 2:2 Like newborn babies, long for the pure milk of the Word, so that by it you may grow in respect to salvation
Mar 01 – 1 Peter 2:3 – if you have tasted the kindness of the Lord.
Mar 15 – Psalm 5:3 In the morning, O LORD, You will hear my voice; In the morning I will order my prayer to you and eagerly watch.
April 01 - Proverbs 31:10 An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels.
April 15 – Proverbs 31:11-12 The heart of her husband trusts her, and He will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.
May 01 – Proverbs 31:13 – She looks for wool and flax and works with her hands in delight.
May 15 – Proverbs 31:14 – She is like merchant ships; She brings her food from afar.
June 01 – She rises also while it is still night and gives food to her household and portions to her maidens.
June 15 – She considers a field and buys it from her earnings she plants a vineyard.
July 01 – She girds herself with strength and makes her arms strong.
These verses were not random verses but Words from God that I feel He wants to work in me during this season of my walk. I have recently dropped my working hours outside my home from 32 to 16 in order to stay at home and care for my Grandchildren, my family and get my home in order. It seems I am just now beginning to feel like I can breathe and perhaps start getting things in order and establish my priorities. I know my first step is to get strong by filling my heart and mind with God’s Word daily and allowing it to strengthen me as I taste and see that the Lord is Good.
Won’t you join me by sharing a Word that you want to memorize this week on your journey?
Now…it is 6:17 and I see that the night has turned to morning and I think I will take another positive step and go outside and walk. Exercise …. That is a story for another day….
Blessings to you all today!